Becoming Holy

When Life Changes…

on August 26, 2013


In 1995, at Christmas, I had to write the most difficult Christmas letter to date.  Jennifer had passed the end of October and our family was never going to be what it had been.  It would never be “right” this side of Heaven.  I find the words from that letter coming back to mind and heart as we prepare for our next big change.  

These words are from a precious scene in “The Muppet Christmas Carol” when Kermit the Frog, playing the role of Bob Cratchit, speaks to his wife and children about the death of Tiny Tim.  Ebenezer Scrooge and the Ghost of Christmas Future are looking on.  “Life is made up of meetings and partings.  That is the way of it.  I am sure we shall never forget Tiny Tim nor this first parting there was among us.”  I still choke up every time I watch this movie.  It was relatively new back in 1994 when I first saw it.  Watching it shortly after Jennifer died had profound impact. This summarized our year in 1995. Gabbie had just joined our family in August and Jennifer had left in October.  Meetings and partings.  That is the way of it.  

Fast forward to 2013~meetings and partings.  Reunited with family and friends where we grew up.  Our children are busy meeting new people, meeting a new community, meeting new adventures.  Parting.  Parting with old friends.  Parting with our neighborhood.  Parting with our faith community in Kennewick.  Parting with Jordan.  Parting with a season of life.  That is the way of it.

There is a difference I feel in my soul.  That first parting with Jennifer was different.  The permanence of death is heavy. And despite the crushing weight of loss, we remember.  We survived the first parting and because of our faith in Jesus, we know we will be “meeting” her again.  The kind of parting that happens by moving does not bear the heaviness of death, but it holds elements of mourning and sorrow as things will not remain the same.  I share in the anguish of my peers who are sending their children off to college.  We all mourn together the changes of life.  The partings that will shift our family dynamic.  The knowledge that things will never be the same.  I also share JOY~this is what is supposed to happen.  At Mass yesterday, a friend and I were talking.  Her son had just left for college that morning and the tears were right at the surface.  She reminded me, and herself, that it IS what is supposed to happen or we would be 40 something year olds, living at home with our parents.  We both giggled at the thought~such a healthy reminder that children moving on is the natural progression.  

I expect these next days will be thick with emotion.  Perhaps writing these words will help me live them.  It’s time to be real.  Let the tears fall.  Let the laughter ring out. It’s time to live in the present moment.  No worries about tomorrow.  There will be meetings and partings for the rest of our lives. That is the way of it.  


2 responses to “When Life Changes…

  1. Megan says:

    My heart is heavy for you…awaiting the resurrection with you all xoxoxo

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Phillippians 4: 6-7 "Cast your cares upon the Lord & He will give you a peace and grace beyond understanding" other words.... As Bob Marley sang it, "Say, don't worry, about a 'ting, cuz every little 'ting, is gonnna be alright!"

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